Tuesday, we took a step in moving forward with
international adoptions. Such an exciting day, and a meeting that I was very
much looking forward to for the past month – this meeting has been a long time
coming, but scheduling was difficult with the busyness of summer schedules.
Emily and I had a meeting in Kampala with the in-country representative of a
pretty big adoption agency in the States. (We haven’t officially signed with
them yet, so I may wait until that happens to disclose which agency this is.)
But we are so excited!
Finding an agency that we desired a partnership with has
also been something that has taken a long time, and even in this decision it
has taken a big leap of faith. There are countless adoption agencies in the
States, and I’m sure even more around the world, but it was important for us to
seek and find an agency that lined up with our ethical beliefs and practices,
as well as practiced what they preached, so to speak. This was a pretty
incredible learning experience for me over the past several months, as I
learned positive qualities of agencies, big red flags, the market in the adoption world, as well as what we wanted in an
agency that we worked with.
This takes me back to my little mini-series on
Adoption, and
the question
Where does it go wrong? The
more I learn about adoption, especially in Uganda, the more I learn about the
messiness and corruption of it, as sad as it is. But in the process of opening
my eyes to this, the Lord has given me a heart to share it with those around me
– because once you know, it’s hard to play ignorant. And by not being ignorant
to such a big conversation in the world, you learn the questions to ask, the
efforts to support, and very realistic steps to take in supporting the orphan
crisis in the world today – whether or not you ever want to adopt.
In seeking partnership with an international adoption agency
we had a couple red flags that if they became evident, we would turn the other
way running.
First, does the agency own/financially support or sustain
any orphanages? At first glance this question may not seem all so important,
but let me explain. Adoption is a supply-and-demand sort of thing. Economics
was by far not my easiest class in college, but I did come to understand the
concept of this. The demand are the people who want to adopt. The supply are
the children in orphanages – but, notice I did not say the ‘orphans’ or the
‘children who need to be adopted’ or the ‘children whose lives would be better
in America’. Often these are all used interchangeably, but this really isn’t
the case. Around 80-90% of children in orphanages have at least one living
parent, most of whom could be resettled with their families or extended family,
and do not need to be adopted. But because of the market in adoptions, these families are frequently overlooked, lied
to, threatened, or misguided in order to supply the demand for cute, little,
African children.
Second, does the agency provide any money to the orphanage?
Again, this is an unethical practice, but happens all too frequently as a means
to encourage orphanages to supply them with adoptable
children.
Third, does the agency work with any orphanages in Uganda
that are on “our list”? There are over 400 orphanages in Uganda, and a friend
of mine who is working for family preservation here, said that she would
recommend three for people to adopt from. This doesn’t mean that every child in
all these other homes should not be adopted, but that people should proceed
with caution once getting a referral for a child in these orphanages. However,
the orphanages that made it onto our list, we know of specific examples of
unethical practices that they have done in either getting children or adopting
them out, or they are not fighting at all from family reunification or domestic
adoption.
There are more, but these are a couple big ones, that if you
are like me about a year ago, you knew nothing about. But now let me tell you
some of the values of the agency we want to work with. The Ugandan
representative told us that once getting a referral from the orphanage of an
adoptable child, they will conduct their own investigation of the child, as
well as hire a third party to do the same. This way when the child and
prospective adoptive family go to court there is three separate social work
reports (including ours) that will be presented to state that this child does
not have family to care for them, and they truly are in need of a family. They
also have the same values in seeking family reunification above all else, then
domestic adoption, and then proceeding with international adoption as a last
case. This s something we highly value, as I’ve mentioned before, and we are so
excited to find an agency with a similar and encouraging agenda.
Sorry this post is a bit all over the place, but like I
said, God is using this experience to open my eyes and heart to a big issue,
and I also believe that He is able to use me to educate those around me. In the
book Orphan Justice (great read and very informative) the tagline for
the title is, “Not everyone can do
everything, but everyone can do something”. I pray that my time here in
Uganda, as well as for the rest of my life, I am challenged to do the things
that the Lord is placing in front of me, not everything, but something. I want
to challenge you to think about what’s something
you can do?
“I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”
Philippians 4:13